really hate myself for being like this. like i cant stop thinking about how awkward things will be if i do this do that. like im not a good conversationalist yet i start convos with people den i end up "backing out". sometimes i wish i was who i were in sec 1, the carefree damn naive and the dun give a damn attitude just say whatever i want but then i realised that was what that lost me so many friends. because they couldnt stand me. damn conflicted sia. ppl dun just accept u for who u are. might think its ok at first but after a while they will also get tired and will yearn for someone better. i just wish i was naturally good at talking at making ppl laugh.
i noe that i should just love myself because this is who i am but i am obviously an unsatisfactory product. maybe its because of this thinking thats why i feel so alone all of the time D: but i cant help but to feel this way. rehtietnoduoyyhwdnatsrednuiyhwstahtemevolnudi
and i really want to ask you about it but i dun dare to because of this and that but i care! i really do! please :(
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